There are no parties, there are no policies, there are only three blokes competing to be the next Prime Minister. This is how the media have decided to play the election. This is politics as organised by the Murdoch machine. It doesn't really matter who wins, the country's going down the pan; it'll just go a little faster with the Cameronians, and Murdoch will get to see the BBC dismantled.

This is Charlie Brooker's take on Murdoch's three stooges -

Brown - "Technical in the social situation, sociable in the technical situation? That's the hallmark of a nerd. And most nerds are simply too gawky – gawky, not aloof – to connect with the general public."

Clegg - "roughly 50% daytime soap, 40% human, and 10% statesman."

Cameron - "100% something. He isn't even a man; more a texture-mapped character model. There's a different kind of software at work here, some advanced alien technology projecting a passable simulation of affability; a straight-to-DVD retread of the Blair ascendancy re-enacted by androids."

Same fellow on our press -"Two-faced contempt is the basic mode of operation for many newspapers: mindwarping shitsheets filled with selective reporting and audacious bias. The popular press is a shrill, idiotic, bullying echo chamber; a hopelessly poisoned Petri dish in which our politicians seem resigned to grow."

The "shitsheets" have already written off Brown (though the electorate might decide to vote for a party not a leader). That may be a "mitzvah", because, according to Mervyn King, whichever party forms the next government will have to unleash such a savage assault on our living standards that they will render themselves unelectable for some time thereafter.
Me, I won't be voting for any of them, or their useless parties, or their anti-social policies.